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Have you ever felt like you take 1 step forward and 2 steps back? That's how I feel at this moment.

I graduated from college in 3 years with a pretty darn good GPA, I went on to get a job and have since pursued oportunities to better myself (and my pay) within my chosen field. I am currently in grad school pursuing my Masters in Education Administration in hopes of one day being an assistant principal or principal. I did all the "right" things, but it seems like we can't get ahead financially.

I KNOW MONEY ISN'T EVERYTHING. Let me make that abundantly clear. But as I sit here in my hot warm living room (our air conditioner broke yesterday) I wonder how we are going to afford to fix it and money seems to be a BIG thing. 

I KNOW that God will provide for us to get by. He always has, but honestly I am getting tired of just getting by. I know I should be thankful, but right now in this moment I am not.

Ryan is pursing a career change and we are so excited about this new opportunity with the Houston Fire Department, but in the mean time is means some MAJOR financial changes in our life. While he is in the academy and in his probationary year we will have to cut back in a major way, which seems easy enough, unless you consider that we already live relatively meagerly. I know that we will make it work, and I know that we will be stronger because of it; however right now, in this moment, I am FREAKING OUT nervous. I am scared, I don't know HOW it's going to work. I think Dave Ramsey said it best when he talks about how when there is any kind of financial trouble a woman gets scared in a place men don 't even have.

I guess I should stop complaining and worrying and get into problem solving mode, but right now I'm just not there yet. Here's hoping I'll get there soon.